Inauguration

Entry #1.  February 9, 2012, 8:40 pm.  Atlanta Airport, Gate E28.  Rarely is one ever in a completely new mental state, when it is hard to process or control thoughts. I realize this because I am looking out the window at American soil, not knowing when I’ll see it again.  It is quite an exotic feeling, and one that is both thrilling and intimidating.  I’m waiting to board my flight to Seoul, South Korea, en route to Phnom Penh, Cambodia.  I thought now was a good time to initiate my blog, as my head is pounding with feelings of excitement and eagerness, and I hope they are therefore reflected in my writing.  Before I delve into the dangerous world that is Jonathan Martin’s head, I must give out a disclaimer to all blog readers.  I have a tendency to stray from the politically correct and mainstream politeness.  Although I might not breach outright offensiveness, I enjoy writing so that my thoughts run through my fingers onto the screen unfiltered.  And I particularly enjoy stereotypes.  Basically, this means I will be making fun of a lot of people and things and the language may be colorful.  Certainly not the whole rainbow, but a majority of the spectrum.  I am allowed to say I love stereotypes because I am the seoul American (that cheesy joke was for you, Dad) in the KoreanAir terminal that is munching on McDonald’s, watching ESPN, and hoarding all the outlets to plug in my Apple products.  That being said, I plan to have a funny Asian picture of the week, so stay tuned because the people for KoreanAir are already starting to line up and I can tell this is going to be a great theme.  In fact, anyone who has been on a Martin family vacation knows that I am dangerous when I have the camera.  I can’t help but take pictures of comical Asian tourists, all in the name of the book I want to publish.  Have you heard of the coffee table book Awkward Family Photos?  Well, I plan to write its successor- Funny Asian Tourists.  These two books complemented with Kramer’s Coffee Table Book About Coffee Tables would provide endless entertainment to anyone that sits at your couch.  I am by no means prejudice or feel superior, but I find Asian people fascinating, brilliant, and consequently hilarious.  Think of it as an anthropologic study.  Actually, I was going to have my picture taken with an Asian lady in the airport and pretend that I already made it to Asia, but the crowd in line at Popeye’s Chicken in the background certainly would have given America away.  Note that I am in Atlanta, nonetheless.   I do have a deep respect for Asia and its peoples, which is partly why I wanted to embark on this journey.  Mostly, though, I want to experience the world and gain a new perspective on life, and I believe that the Eastern hemisphere- the other half of the world- can fit the bill.  After researching many places and watching the Travel Channel religiously, I concluded that Vietnam is a country that can and will fulfill my endless curiosity to experience new cultures. 

So welcome to my blog.  I hope that it is at least entertaining and offers a glimpse into my  riveting adventure ahead.  It’s name is Saigon to ‘Nam, as I will be gone, teaching English in Saigon after my first month in Cambodia.  Other potential names for the blog included “Rice Paddy Life”, “Back in ‘Nam”, “Peace, Love, and Ho Chi Minh”, “Herrow from Vietnam”, “White Meets Yellow”, “Not Deceased but in the Far East”, and “Teaching Asians to Speak Good”.  If someone comes up with something better, I will consider changing the name.  I must also apologize for any future setbacks, as I am not the most technologically advanced.  Actually, a friend of mine told me a story of another traveler’s blog, in which the author traveled to India and was amazed by the Henna art tattoos that were even painted on the cows.  When she wanted to give a photographic example of the cow, she accidentally uploaded a prominent picture of herself!  (Thanks Nancy for that story- shout out to Connecticut.)  I actually hope that I can pull something off like that, even if it is at my expense, if it means my blog will be more amusing. 

Well I fear that my posts will run lengthy, and I must go browse the magazines as well as try to finagle an aisle seat.  I tried calling a few weeks ago to obtain an aisle seat, citing that I had “issues”, whether that be claustrophobia or bladder problems was up to the agent to imagine.  However, now that I am near the ticket counter and in desperation I might need to take a more direct, explicit, and raunchier approach to secure an aisle seat.  I’ll let you all speculate what my “issue” will be.  Note: I just ate my last Big Mac.

With that, I leave you until my next post, which will be from the other half of the world.  I cannot wait, I value all of you, and feel free to comment!  Farewell, ‘Muricah!

Oops- first mistake.  Although I plan on getting tan, this is not me.

Did not bring the hat.